In a recent column, David O’Brien, the associate director of religious education for lay ministry in the Archdiocese of Mobile, Ala., recounts the story of Agnes and Jake, devout Catholics who conceived and delivered four children during the first five years of their marriage.
Agnes described how Jake, “wanted to be a good father and husband, and he couldn’t see how that could happen if we continued to have more children. In short, he was getting a vasectomy.”
Spouse no longer open to life
Agnes had a strong Catholic formation, and understood that married couples should not engage in sexual acts that have been intentionally blocked or “rendered infecund.” She struggled with Jake’s new stance, and dug her heels in.
She wondered how she could possibly be an authentic witness to the Gospel “if within my marriage, I was no longer open to life? How could I minister to other women and encourage them to be bold in their faith if I wasn’t living it myself? And what do I teach my children about marriage and sex when their father and I weren’t aligned?”
