Dear Readers, Have you ever left home without your cell phone?
I’ve done it a few times before, but this was the first time I did not return home to retrieve it.
After all, before the age of cordless phones, back when we only had landlines or Remco Buck Rogers Walkie Talkies with which to communicate, we did okay.
Of course, there was that first year out of college. My Dad worried so much about me driving through remote areas with my new job that he bought me a CB radio.
Thankfully, “Lindy Lou” never did have any road emergencies, but I did enjoy conversing with some very nice truckers.
The CB didn’t last long though as Mom became concerned when I started calling her “Good Buddy” and peppering my conversations with phrases such as, “Breaker, breaker, one-niner.”
Dad confiscated the CB.
Nowadays, even without a cell or a CB, we should all feel safe if we leave home without our phones as absolutely everyone else out there has one; there will always be somebody who will call AAA for us.
Luckily, as Blanche DuBois so famously said, we can always rely “on the kindness of strangers.”
Truth be told, it’s much more troubling to leave the house without your driver’s license.
The last time that happened, I noticed a police car right behind me on Mineral Point Rd. in Madison and was convinced he knew I was license-less so I pulled off into a parking lot so he could arrest me without disrupting traffic.
But he didn’t arrest me; instead, he sped off down the road with lights flashing and siren wailing to arrest some other poor, more deserving soul.
Most aggravating, however, is when I leave home without my coupons.
Don’t you hate it, dear Readers, when you’ve made it to the front of that long checkout line at Pick ‘N Save only to discover you forgot to bring your “Buy one, get one free — any variety of General Mills cereals, 12 ounces or larger” coupon?
For some reason, neither the cashier nor the people in line behind me are ever willing to wait while I run home to get it.
And so, I decided to tape a checklist entitled “Don’t Leave Home Without It” to the doorway into the garage so that every time I leave the house, I can glance at the essential items I should have on me.
But then . . .
I happened upon Colossians 3:12 which says, in part, “Put on . . . compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.”
Hmmmm . . . do I ensure I always have those essentials with me when I head out the door?
Ephesians 6:11 instructs us to “put on the full armor of God . . . belt of truth, breastplate of righteousness, the gospel of peace, and the shield of faith.”
Aren’t I really underdressed if I leave home without those items?
Quite a different checklist. What would I be like, indeed, what would the world be like if we all fortified ourselves not with phones or wallets or coupons, but with the true accessories of our faith every single time we left our homes?
Aren’t we better equipped if we have an angel in our pocket instead of a phone in our purse?
And who could argue that all car rides and grocery lines wouldn’t be better with God as our co-pilot and co-shopper?
If you recall the finale of A Streetcar Named Desire, things did not end well for poor old Blanche DuBois.
Instead of relying on the kindness of strangers, she would have been better off relying on the kindness and the mercy and the strength of the Lord.
So, I’ve modified that checklist next to the garage door, and instead of “Don’t Leave Home Without It,” it’s now entitled, “Don’t Leave Home Without Him.”
Linda E. Kelly is a member of Blessed Sacrament Parish in Madison.