Q I am an only child with parents who are nearing their mid 70s.
My mother recently pointed out that some of their friends are speaking to their children about power of attorney for health and financial matters in the event of an illness or loss of capacity.
Is it automatic that I, again as an only child, should be responsible for everything? Is that wise? I am not even sure what all of that responsibility would entail.
(From a daughter in Portage).
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| Ask IPS |
Question: “During Lent, I feel like there is a large emphasis on sinfulness. I find myself feeling constantly ashamed of my past sins. Is this healthy?”
Response:William McKenna, M.S., Clinical Extern at the IPS Center for Psychological Services
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Q My siblings and I gave our mother the gift of in-home assistance for Christmas.
She lives just outside of Madison and the rest of us live in surrounding counties.
The idea was to provide some support because we can’t be there as much as we would like and mom does not ask us for help.
She was reluctant to accept it at first, but then agreed that she could use some help with certain things.
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QUESTION: While everyone else seems joyful, I often feel depressed around the holidays. Could you suggest some ways to cope with the holiday blues?
RESPONSE: By William McKenna, M.S., clinical extern at the IPS Center for Psychological Services
We so often hear Christmas songs with lines such as, “It’s the most wonderful time of the year!” and “Christmas time is here. Happiness and cheer!”
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Q This may have been asked before, but I need some advice on how to manage holiday gatherings with someone who has dementia.
My mother lives with my sister. Mom has Alzheimer’s disease and my sister wants the entire family, all 25 of us, to gather at her home for Christmas.
I think it will be too hard for mom to be around all of us at the same time. My sister thinks we might not have another Christmas with mom so I don’t know how far to push.
(From a son in Sun Prairie).
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QUESTION: What does mental health have to do with our faith?
RESPONSE: By William McKenna, M.S., clinical extern at the IPS Center for Psychological Services
For years, psychology and theology were like two squabbling siblings. Always ready to fight, but actually always seeking the same end.
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Q From the past columns I have read, my situation is different. I am the 79-year-old mother of a disabled daughter.
My health is pretty good, but I realize I will not be around forever. I have taken care of “Nancy” all my life, and she and I are very close.
I have not made any plans for her and wonder where to begin. She is my only child, and the thought of any other distant relatives caring for her is out of the question.
(From a mother in Monroe)
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Q I have always considered my parents to be intelligent and capable of making good decisions, but I wonder if they may be taken in by a new acquaintance who is also in the investment business.
They recently invested in a project that is “going to be huge,” according to the investor. My parents were told not to share too many details because they are a few of the “special people” who were allowed in on this.
It sounds so fishy to me, but they think this is the next big thing but they can’t tell me what it is. Am I over-reacting? (A concerned son in Evansville).
